Friday, 28 October 2016

Can I have romance/intimacy with my wife while she is in the state of impurity (menses and after child birth (Nifaas)) ?

A man can get physically involved with his significant other when she is bleeding or in nifaas. This matter is very important in Islamic marriages and mubashrat in islam so read it complete. This falls into three classifications:
 

1 – Being private and having sex with her in the vagina. This is haraam as per the agreement of the Muslims and the content of the Qur'aan. Allah says (translation of the significance):
"They ask you concerning monthly cycle. Say: that is an Adha (an unsafe thing for a spouse to have a sex with his significant other while she is having her menses), in this way, avoid ladies amid menses and go not unto them till they are cleansed (from menses)
also, have scrubbed down)" [al-Baqarah 2:222] 

2 – Being personal by kissing, grasping, touching and so on parts that are over the navel and beneath the knee. This is passable as indicated by insightful agreement.
 See Sharh Muslim by al-Nawawi, and al-Mughni, 1/414

3 – Being personal with respect to the region between the navel and the knee, aside from the
front or back entry. The researchers contrasted regarding whether this is reasonable. Imam Abu 
Haneefah, Imam Maalik and al-Shaafa'i were of the view this is haraam, and Imam
Ahmad was of the view this is allowable; the last view was likewise shared by a few
Hanafis, Maalikis and Shaafa'is. Al-Nawawi said: The proof for this view is more grounded and it
is the favoured view.
The individuals who say that it is passable cited prove from the Qur'aan and Sunnah.
With respect to Qur'aanic confirm, they cited the verse specified above (understanding of the significance):
"along these lines, avoid ladies amid menses and go not unto them till they are purged (from menses and have scrubbed down)" [al-Baqarah 2:222]
The expression fi'l-maheed (interpreted as amid menses) alludes to both the season of monthly cycle and the site of period, which is the vagina. Insofar as the lady is bleeding, engaging in sexual relations with her in the vagina is haraam.
Ibn Qudaamah said in al-Mughni, 1/415:
The way that the site of draining is said particularly shows that it is passable to be cozy in different zones.
As to the Sunnah, Muslim (302) described from Anas that the Jews, if any of their ladies was bleeding, would not eat with them or meet with them in their homes. The associates of the Prophet (peace and gifts of Allah be upon him) asked the Prophet (peace and endowments of Allah be upon him) about that, then Allah uncovered the verse (elucidation of the significance):
"They ask you concerning feminine cycle. Say: that is an Adha (an unsafe thing for a spouse to have a sex with his significant other while she is having her menses), in this way, avoid ladies amid menses and go not unto them till they are decontaminated (from menses and have cleaned up). What's more, when they have cleaned themselves, then go in unto them as Allah has appointed for you (go in unto them in any way the length of it is in their vagina). Genuinely, Allah adores the individuals who turn unto Him in apology and loves the individuals who refine themselves"
[al-Baqarah 2:222]
The Messenger of Allah (peace and endowments of Allah be upon him) said: "So do everything aside from intercourse." News of that achieved the Jews and they said, "What does this man need? He doesn't leave any of our undertakings yet he varies from it!"
What is implied by "they would not meet with them in their homes" is that they would not blend with them or remain in a similar live with them. This was the perspective of al-Nawawi.
Abu Dawood (272) described from 'Ikrimah from one of the spouses of the Prophet (peace and favors of Allah be upon him) that when the Prophet (peace and gifts of Allah be upon him) needed to participate in any closeness with one of his wives when she was discharging, he would put a bit of material over her private part. Al-Haafiz said: its isnaad is qawiy (solid); it was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 242. 
It says in Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa'imah, 5/395:
It is haraam for the spouse to engage in sexual relations with his better half in her vagina when she is discharging, yet he might get physically involved with her wherever else.
It is better for the man, on the off chance that he needs to get physically involved with his significant other when she is bleeding, to advise her to wear something to cover her between the navel and the knees, then he might get physically involved with her in some other region.
Al-Bukhaari (302) and Muslim (2293) portrayed that 'Aa'ishah said: "In the event that one of us was discharging and the Messenger of Allah (peace and favors of Allah be upon him) needed to get physically involved with her, he would advise her to wear an izaar (abdomen wrapper) at the pinnacle of her feminine cycle, then he would get physically involved with her."
Muslim (294) portrayed that Maymoonah said: The Messenger of Allah (peace and favors of Allah be upon him) would get physically involved with his spouses over the izaar (midriff wrapper) when they were discharging.
"The pinnacle of her feminine cycle" implies toward the starting when the stream is heaviest. This was the perspective of al-Khattaabi.
Ibn al-Qayyim said in Tahdheeb al-Sunan, remarking on hadeeth no. 2167 from 'Awn alMa'bood:
The hadeeth "Do everything with the exception of intercourse" unmistakably shows that what is illegal is just intercourse in the site of period, which is intercourse in the vagina, yet everything else is admissible. The hadeeth which talk about the izaar (midsection wrapper) don't negate that, since that is a careful step and is better.
It might be that a refinement is made between the start of the period and the end, so it is mustahabb to cover the region between the navel and the knee when the draining is heaviest, which is toward the start of the period.
Al-Haafiz said:
This is bolstered by the hadeeth described by Ibn Maajah with a hasan isnaad from Umm Salamah, that the Prophet (peace and favors of Allah be upon him) would dodge closeness with her for three (days), then he would get physically involved with her after that.

Note:
The decisions specified above apply to both discharging ladies and ladies in nifaas (seeping after labor). 
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah show kindness toward him) said, in the wake of specifying the decisions on a man getting physically involved with his significant other when she is bleeding:
The lady in nifaas resemble the lady who is bleeding in such manner.

Al-Mughni, 1/419.

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